


Maybe with enough duct tape

by Bill_Longbow



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Break Up, Fluff, Getting Back Together, M/M, Misunderstandings, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug, Tony Stark Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-21
Updated: 2017-12-21
Packaged: 2019-02-18 00:11:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,511
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13088361
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bill_Longbow/pseuds/Bill_Longbow
Summary: This was a stupid plan, so very, very stupid, but given the choice he would rather face one disappointed Steve than a horde of disappointed Carbonells.Even though Tony forgot to mention he broke up with his boyfriend and Rhodey refuses to dye his hair it might all work out in the end.





	Maybe with enough duct tape

**Author's Note:**

> For this unclaimed holiday exchange prompt that I couldn't resist:
> 
> “So, like, I know we broke up and stuff, but funny story, I haven’t told my family yet and they just assumed you’d be coming with me for {insert family celebration} and I really don’t know how to tell them and I know this is really selfish, but I can’t break my great grandma’s heart like that, she’ll probably have a heart attack and-- wait, what? You’d do that for me? Holy shit, I love you… wait--” AU (breaking up and getting back together, angst with a happy ending)

Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit, oh shit… Maybe he could create a lab accident? Break a leg? Fake the flu. Nah, he couldn’t afford any more breaking of lab equipment, Coulson would revoke his all hours entry. And only death was deemed a serious enough physical impairment to warrant staying away from the annual Carbonell family get together.

He sighed, how could he have forgotten it was  _ this _ weekend. He knew the answer of course. Ever since the break-up he had drowned himself in coffee and work. Hence, the increase in small lab fires. (What Coulson didn’t know about didn’t officially count, okay?) He paced up and down his dorm room, hands pulling at his hair. What to do, what to do, what to do?

It wouldn’t have been this bad  _ before _ the breakup. He would actually have really enjoyed himself, showing off his gorgeous boyfriend, making his nieces jealous, indulge in  _ not _ being the one all the aunts were nagging at about lack of partner. Everyone would have been totally smitten with the guy, how could they not be.

He banged his head against the wall to stop that line of thought before he would start sobbing. Sobbing only made his head hurt and his face a splodgy mess.

Maybe he should emigrate. He could move to Europe. If he went to the bank now, he would be able to collect enough cash to at least start out somewhere. He had heard good things about Amsterdam. He could grow a beard and start a bike repair shop. If he was frugal and saved some money he could buy himself a windmill to live in.

He stood some moments overthinking his plan, feeling more and more confident that this was the best course of action. Except for the beard. Unfortunately his Mediterranean ancestry hadn’t seen fit to bless him with a lot of facial hair.

While he was examining his chin in the mirror Rhodey stepped into their room.

“Tones! Isn’t it your family gathering this weekend? What are you still doing here?” Rhodey knew about the sacredness of the weekend, one simply did not miss it.

“Honeybear! Just the man I was looking for!” He nearly tackled Rhodey in a hug. “How would you feel about pretending to be my boyfriend this weekend? People think we're hooked up all the time, it's perfect!” For effect he threw in his best winning smile, but Rhodey dislodged him from where he was clinging to his arm.

“Why?” Rhodey drew the syllable out like he did when he wasn't going to cooperate.

“Because you’re my best friend in the whole world, probably solar system, and I don't want to miss you for two whole days?”

Rhodey only narrowed his eyes and crossed his arms over his chest, a perfect copy of Mama Rhodes when she was tired of your BS.

“Because it's a four hour drive and I need someone to distract me?” he tried again.

Rhodey didn't even dignify that with a response, picking up his backpack and going over to his desk to study.

Tony let himself fall backward on his bed with a sigh. “Okay, I might have forgotten to mention the breakup and everyone's expecting Steve to come.”

Rhodey turned around. “You want me to pretend I'm Steve?”

“Well, you're the same height?”

Rhodey just looked at him, before shaking his head and going back to his book.

“Spoilsport,” he Tony mutters under his breath.

“I'm not blond, Tony!”

Well, if that was the only hangup, they could easily remedy--

“And I'm not going to bleach my hair,” Rhodey said as he turned another page.

How did Rhodey…? He didn't even say anything. He flipped over onto his front. Maybe he would be lucky and a meteorite would strike him within the next hour.

“I'm sorry, bud, I've got work this weekend, you shoulda asked me sooner if you wanted me to come.” Rhodey really was a great friend. “Why don't you just come clean?”

When Tony did nothing but sigh morosely, Rhodey came over and flopped on top of him for a hug. Rhodey was the best.

  
  


This was a stupid plan, so very, very stupid, but given the choice he would rather face one disappointed Steve than a horde of disappointed Carbonells. His mom had made this whole production of him having finally hooked up. She had told the family glorious tales about her son's boyfriend, about how gorgeous and tall he was, about his artistic talent. It had gotten to the point where the whole family was psyched to finally meet this marvel of a human being, but Tony had to screw it up, of course.

He'd been pacing up and down in front of Steve's door for nearly twenty minutes now, rehearsing what he could say that didn't make him into a total douche. So far he was coming up blank.

He nearly fell over when suddenly the door opened, revealing a disheveled Steve, which was weird because Steve was Immaculate Appearance personified. But here he was, with sweatpants and a few days old beard, looking shocked to see him. Worry instantly flooded Tony and took over his brain. He stretched out his hands like he encountered a skittish animal and checked Steve over for other signs of illness. “Steve! Are you… are you sick? Do you need a doctor? You have been hydrating, haven't you? Do you need anything? I can go over to the pharmacist, no trouble, I can--

“I'm not sick, Tony.” Steve crossed his arms over his chest defensively. “What are you doing here?” Steve didn't meet his eye as he asked this, watching where he was drawing patterns on the floor with his foot instead.

That was... not promising, but Tony couldn't stop his mouth from blurting, keyed up as he was. “So, like, I know we broke up and stuff, but funny story, I haven’t told my family yet and they just assumed you’d be coming with me for the Carbonell annual get together, and I really don’t know how to tell them and I know this is really selfish, but I can’t break my great grandma’s heart like that, she’ll probably have a heart attack and--”

“Okay,” Steve said gruffly.

“Wait, what?”

“Okay,” Steve cleared his throat, “I'll go with you to your family thing.” He sounded a bit unsure while unfolding his arms and shoving his hands in the pockets of his sweats.

“You'll go? That's… Oh wow!” Tony bounced over to hug Steve, but he stopped mid bounce and felt incredibly awkward. Hugging wasn't an option anymore, he blew that chance, but if Steve somehow found it in his heart to still be friends, he sure as hell wasn't going to spoil that with unwanted touching.

He rubbed his neck instead. “Are you, eh, are you going like this? I mean… it's obviously fine, you look  _ great _ with the, with the facial hair and all, and the Carbonells aren't as stuck up as the Starks, thank God, but--”

“I'll change, you wait here.” Steve turned abruptly on his heel and shut the door in Tony's face.

“It's an overnight stay, you should pack something warm,” he yelled through the closed door.

Tony couldn't believe his luck. Or not quite luck? He had no clue what to call this. He resumed his pacing as he waited for Steve to come out again, only this time he was mulling over everything that might've led to the breakup and should therefore Not Be Mentioned. He was pretty sure it came down to him being him, which was kinda hard to fix, especially during a four hour drive.

He could start by talking less. His tendency to put his foot in his mouth had gotten him into more trouble than he cared to remember. Steve must've suffered under his constant ramblings and lack of brain to mouth filter. So when Steve reemerged from his room, clean shaven and wearing a nice trouser/shirt combination, Tony only gave him a smile and a thumbs up before picking up his own duffel bag and leading the way to the parking lot.

He unlocked his car remotely and made it fold the roof up. He was fiercely protective of his customised, red and gold Cadillac Eldorado, which meant the total number of people to have been allowed to drive it amounted to zero. Tony was used to being called selfish, it had never really bothered him, but maybe it was one of the things that had driven Steve away? On impulse he threw the keys in Steve's direction. “Wanna drive?”

Steve's eyes lit up; he had a weak spot for the car as well. “Are you sure, Tony?”

“Sure, I'm sure,” he answered as he threw his bag on the rear seat and took a seat on the passenger’s side. When Steve still stood looking doubtful Tony patted the driver's seat. “Come on, you don't want to give her the impression you don't like her, do you?”

Steve grinned at that and quickly threw his bag in the car as well. He got in and caressed the steering wheel. “Oh, she'll know I love her, alright.”

Tony bit back a groan because he  _ knew _ what it felt like to be loved by Steve Rogers, and he wanted that back so bad it was like a physical ache in his stomach. Unmindful of Tony's plight, Steve put the car in gear and took off.

Tony spend the first twenty miles praying to the pantheon to please keep them alive, because Steve drove like a lunatic. Tony tried to wave apologetically at every angry horn, but he soon put on his sunglasses and pretended he wasn't in the car, which was considerably hampered by the fact that he was being tossed around like a ragdoll.

It wasn't until after they left the city limits behind and were cruising on a relatively quiet highway, that Tony dared to loosen his death grip on the door frame. This was a mistake, because Steve chose exactly that moment to really push down the accelerator, laughing loudly.

Tony really couldn't do anything but be enamoured of Steve, this was the most carefree he had seen him in months. The adrenaline rush made him goopy, so he was probably smiling like a loon, but when Steve caught his eye and smiled back it felt just like old times.

Tony quickly turned away, the happy feeling evaporating in an instant. They spent the next hour in silence. Tony kept his gaze firmly locked on the passing terrain, though he couldn't for the life of him recount where they were, too focused on not bursting out in tears. Why on earth did he think he would be able to be around Steve, without touching him, or hugging him, or giving him sappy compliments?

He payed more attention to their surroundings when Steve turned off the highway and onto a smaller road.

At Tony's questioning glance Steve’s stomach rumbled audibly and he gave a bashful smile. “Didn't eat this morning,” he explained while turning into a diner’s parking lot.

This was just as disconcerting as Steve's shabby appearance; Steve  _ always _ had breakfast. He had also tried his best to get Tony to ingest something other than coffee in the mornings, ranging from giving lectures to finding a coffee flavoured cereal (which was disgusting, but Steve had looked so proud at finding it that Tony had bravely soldiered through the entire box). Tony pushed back the urge to ask if Steve really was feeling okay; it was none of his business anymore.

They got out and Steve gave Tony back his keys. “Thanks, Tony. She's a real beauty,” he said and he touched the hood before marching for the diner.

 

It was crowded and warm inside; they were just in time for the lunch rush apparently, but they found a little corner booth that fit them both, barely. Sitting squeezed against Steve did nothing to help Tony relax, and Steve looked just as uncomfortable as he was. Tony was wracking his brain in search for suitable small talk, while Steve opened and closed his mouth several times like he wanted to say something but thought better of it.

They were saved by the waitress, a tired looking blonde who perked up at the sight of them and winked. “What can I get you cuties? The special today is a tuna melt, with chips and a side of fruit.”

“Sounds good. I'll have that, and a coffee please… Linda.” Tony gave her his best friendly smile.

“I'll have the same, please.” Steve's smile could outshine the sun.

“Very good, I'll leave you boys to it then.” With another wink she was gone.

“What was that about? Does she wink at all her customers? Is the amount of winking proportionate to the size of the tip?” Tony put a hand over his mouth to stop it from moving. Only one hour in and he had already forgotten his vow of silence.

Steve giggled though, so it probably was okay. “She might have a very localized form of seizures,” he added, making Tony snicker.

“You're evil, Rogers. No one would think you're a dastardly scoundrel, with those huge, blue eyes and that ernest expression, but I know the truth.”

Steve looked very pleased with this assessment before rearranging his face into the most innocent expression imaginable. “I don't know what you're talking about.”

“Don't give me that look, I'm immune to that look.”

Steve said nothing, only continued his puppy eyed assault.

“Okay!” Tony threw his hands up in defeat. “You win! I'm helpless against that look.  _ Anyone _ is helpless against that look. I shudder to think what would happen if you set your mind on world domination. Regimes will topple and fall at your request.”

Steve giggled again which made Tony warm from the inside out.

“You're not so bad yourself,” Steve muttered without looking at him, playing with the salt shaker instead.

Tony had no idea what to do with this statement, but was saved by the waitress who set two cups of coffee down. She gave them another wink before she left, causing the both of them to burst out in giggles.

Steve gave him such a smitten look over his coffee that Tony had to duck his head to hide. He wished his brain would stop projecting like this, Steve had made it abundantly clear that their time together was over. Sitting pressed up against him now, having Steve  _ smile _ at him like that, hurt so much more than Tony could handle.

He took a big sip of coffee and immediately spat it out again. “Ow ow ow, too hot.” He tried to wave some cool air onto his tongue. “Whythosthemumumushateme?”

“The universe doesn't hate you.” Steve passed Tony his water bottle from which he took a grateful sip.

“Could've fooled me,” he murmured and wiped his face with his hands. “Okay, this was obviously a huge mistake, I thought I could do this, that it would be fine, but I really can't, I--”

The waitress arrived with their plates, piled high with sandwiches and fries.

“There you go, anything else for you fellas? Just wave if you want a refill.”

Tony gave her a quick smile, not trusting his voice now. Steve murmured a “thank you, Linda,” because he would be polite under all circumstances.

Once the waitress was gone Steve tucked into his food, practically inhaling the sandwich. Tony tried a few bites but had lost his appetite and only pushed the fries around on his plate. He felt even worse now than when he first got Steve's breakup letter, because now he had even ruined any chance of friendship they might've had, only because he was such a coward.

He looked up in time to see Steve pull his wallet, his lower lip wobbling a bit.

“It's okay, Tony, I understand,” he said softly towards the table, “I had hoped we could still be friends, you know, but it's clear I only make you uncomfortable.”

Well, Tony couldn't deny that. He couldn't explain why Steve looked so sad though.

“You don't have to drive me back, I'll just--”

“Hey, no, that's not fair,” Tony protested, “I'm the one who put you in this situation. I'll take you back if you want to leave.” Tony sighed and dared a glance at Steve who was fumbling with the zipper on his backpack. Might as well come clean since they both were down already.

“I like having you around again, it's just, it hurts, because it's not  _ how _ I want it,” Tony said miserably, pulling his own wallet.

Steve seemed surprised by this. “How do you want it then?”

Did he really want him to spell it out? A flash of anger overtook Tony. First Steve broke up with him via a letter, which was a really shitty thing to do, and now this?

“What do you mean how? How it was before of course! I don't want to be  _ just friends _ , I want everything! But you made it abundantly clear--”

Thinking about the contents of that letter nearly threatened to overwhelm him, so he threw some cash on the table and stood up. “You know what, just forget it. It's fine, it's dandy, let's go.”

With that Tony marched out of the diner and into the parking lot. Steve caught up with him when he was nearly at the car, grabbing his upper arm to spin him around.

“Tony,” he said pleading, “why did you break up with me if you want  _ that _ ?”

Tony sputtered, his brain was trying to compute and failed. “I didn't,” he poked Steve in the chest, “you did.”

Now it was Steve's turn to look indignant. “I would never!”

“Why send me that stupid letter then, huh? Listing all the things I disappointed you in... Like you had a brainstorm session with Howard or something.” Tony paced up and down, gesticulating wildly as he finally gave words to what had nearly defeated him. “I know I'm lousy at remembering important dates, or any date; and I know that if I'm in an engineering binge I lose all track of time; and I  _ know  _ that I can be an obnoxious loudmouth. But you said you were okay with these things, even if you didn't like it all the time! And then to take it back in a letter was incredibly mean and… very unlike you.”

When he received the letter it had registered vaguely in the back of his head that breaking up like this didn't fit Steve's moral code at all, but the letter had neatly listed all the reasons why Tony wasn't good enough for Steve. All the things he had been convinced of himself, no matter how often Steve told him the opposite.

In three large steps Steve was close enough to envelope him in a giant bear hug. “I would never,” he whispered again in Tony's hair.

Tony melted into the hug and felt his eyes moisten. “What the hell happened?” He asked Steve's chest.

“I thought  _ you _ broke up with  _ me,”  _ Steve confessed, gently swaying them from side to side. “You were writing that thesis, remember? And spent all your time in the lab. We fought about that once, because I was really concerned about your lack of sleep.” Tony snorted, he remembered all right, he had been convinced that was the last straw to push Steve away.

“I got a letter a few days later,” Steve continued, “saying how I held you back and that you needed more space.” Tony hugged Steve extra tight.

“Someone played a horrible joke on us Tony.”

“Ty,” Tony snarled. “Must've been. As soon as word about our breakup came out that obnoxious bastard showed up again, wanting to  _ comfort _ me.”

Steve pulled back, his cheeks flushed in anger. “I'm going to kill that creep. He didn't do anything to you did he?” Steve looked him up and down to ascertain himself Tony wasn't hurt.

“Nah, told him where he could stuff his concern.”

“I'm going to sic Nat and Buck on him, he won't dare to hurt anyone ever again.”

Tony grinned, he felt almost sorry for Ty, almost. He shyly looked up at Steve. “Does this mean that..?”

In answer Steve bent down to lay a sweet kiss on Tony's mouth. And then another, and another. Slightly dazed Tony looked up at Steve.

“I'm so glad Rhodey refused to dye his hair.”

Steve guffawed. “I don't… what? Why would he do that?”

Tony smoothed the front of Steve's shirt. “I might've asked him if he could pose as you with my family.”

“You..? Sure, with a dye job you could barely tell us apart,” Steve rolled his eyes fondly.

“Hey, it was a desperate situation,” Tony grinned. “I'm happier with this solution though.” He stood on his toes to kiss Steve again.

“Me too, Tony.”

When Steve winked at him they both lost it.


End file.
